Learn Some Damn Interviewing Skills

Posted: January 27, 2010 in Rap Culture, Social Injustices
Tags: , , ,

There are many vital life skills not being taught in our public schools, such as balancing your finances, managing your credit score, resume writing, and interviewing skills among others. In my many years of management I have found many people are shitty at the latter. I have seen laughable resumes, and countless others bomb interviews. I can tell within the first five minutes whether someone would make a viable candidate for the job. I have ended numerous ones right after the first question. In my experience not all the blame should be placed on our schools. Parents, upbringing, and just plain ignorance are all factors as well. Here are a few of my observations over the years.

  1. Give your children normal names, and please stop being cute by misspelling the name. It not only makes you as the parent look like a complete douche; it also hinders your children in the long run. In the book “Freakonomics” Stephen Dubner and Steven Levitt but this to the test by conducting a study where they sent out identical applications, one with a traditional name spelled correctly, and the other with a “unique” or African American name. The hiring managers chose the traditional name at an extremely high percentage.
  2. This is not “American Idol” never argue with the person responsible for hiring you. I had a girl come in today as a walk-in interview. I saw she did not have the type of nursing home experience we were looking for. She also could not manage to stay at one employer for more than 4 months. I tried to break it to her easy by explaining she lacked the type of experience we are looking for. Instead of accepting this at face value, she started to argue with me. Finally after 15 minutes I had to be brutally honest with her, and proceeded to point out all of her short comings. This was not clear enough for her, and she continued to argue. I finally told her I would need to give it a lot of thought… two hours later she called me to ask if I had time to think about it.
  3. Check the ghetto at the door. The one thing that will get me every time is when someone comes to an interview all ghetto fabulous. What you do and who you are outside of work is none of my concern; what is my concern is how you will be at work. Last time I checked we are still speaking English NOT Ebonics. There is a huge difference between the office and the street, if you are too ignorant to tell the difference… It probably explains why you are currently unemployed.
  4. If you can’t understand/speak fluent English don’t apply for a job that requires those skills. The interview will be cut real short if I have to work really hard at rewording a question because you don’t understand me. Then when you do speak I cannot understand a single word coming out of your mouth. I have no problem with people coming to this country for better opportunities, but know your limitations, and continue to improve on that skill.
  5. Being late or too early. If an interviewee is late or shows up early they are immediately disqualified from being hired. I am probably more annoyed with someone showing up early because it shows a complete lack of respect for the interviewer. There is a reason the interview was set up for this specific time; it this is a form of narcissism in that they feel someone should drop what they are doing to accommodate them.
  6. Coming to the interview stoned. I used to party a lot back in the day so I can spot and smell a fucked up person a mile away. What someone does outside of work is their choice and I am in no place to judge them. What gets me is when you take it to work with you. If you are capable of showing up to an interview stoned, then you will most likely show up to work stoned.
  7. Dressing slutty. I do not like when females come to an interview with a short skirt or low cut shirts showing off cleavage. There are woman out there who attempt to use their looks to gain employment. This tactic is used most when they find out they are interviewing with a man. This is very distracting and diverts my attention to the task at hand. This shows the interviewee lacks the self-esteem to get hired based on their own merits.
  8. Please do not harass me. I think it is appropriate to follow-up with a call thanking me for interviewing them. I hate it when they call multiple times enquiring about the status of their application. I am not a smart man, but I do know if I interview with a company and they do not call me back chances are I didn’t get the job. There have been a few situations where a person called me so many times I had to tell them to stop calling.

Every manager is different on their pet peeves, but I would be willing to guess many of these bother them. I recommend my readers to not fall into any of these traps. I can guarantee if you are interviewing with me and fall into any of these categories I can guarantee you will not be hired.

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Comments
  1. Nicole says:

    LOVE IT!!! So the walk in interview…you bluntly told her no..but changed it to “I have to think about it” .. wha changed you from no?

    People actually come into a NURSING HOME to care for elderly and disabled people..and they are fucked up on drugs?? You should walk their stupid asses to detox next door.

    what constitutes slutty?? just so I do not wear my hooker boots, hulter top, and spike coller to my next interview!!!

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