Couples have vices they keep from their partners from time-to-time; some small and innocent, others major and destructive. They do this because the other one simply doesn’t understand the importance of this vice to the other one. Most men will hide the fact they like to watch porn and do the deed. For others it may be food, drugs, alcohol, or shopping. I am no different then these other people except my vice are energy drinks. I simply love them! The taste is phenomenal and I love the small pep they bring. These beverages are truly a gift from above. I applaud the makers of Redbull for introducing the world to the glorious possibilities energy drinks bring.  

The reason energy drinks are my shameful little secret is because my wife has a very stern stance on the beneficial and ritualistic nature of these drinks. I am not really sure why she has developed a disdain for these products.  She used to have no problems with me purchasing these items; I mean c’mon my drink of choice has always been vodka Redbulls. I do not understand her change of thought on this topic; I think it is from my moms endless speeches about how these drinks are bad for you (thanks mom.) I have now had to resort to getting these drinks anytime I venture out by myself, and quickly drink them before I get home. She knows I do this just like most woman know their husbands spank it to porn. She accepts that I will do this, and understands it is a necessary evil.

To a point I understand why she has made this stand. I am a creature of habit and routine. If my routine gets altered even a little bit I am overcome with stress and anxiety; causing me to become uber agitated. If I were to have an energy drink in the morning it wouldn’t be long until it becomes an everyday habit. I frankly do not see any issue with this, because it would be awesome to start my day off with a coffee and a few hours later savior a tasty treat. She is also under the impression these drinks are horrible for my health (thanks mom.) Here is another concept of this I disagree with. I understand I am on a boatload of meds, but these meds are far more destructive to my health and wellbeing than a daily energy drink.

I will try from time-to-time to slip an energy drink by her in the morning but I am always met with disapproval. I really wanted to try a five hour energy shot today to see what all the hype is about, but didn’t want to waste my time with the debate. I do not understand the appeal of porn, and I am emotionally scarred over masturbating. I do not hide food, because frankly could I get any worse. I stay as far away from shopping as possible. If it were up to me I would shop us into the poor house. There are certain things in a marriage you just concede on because a debate is not worth the hassle. I disagree with her but I respect her stance, which is why I hide drinking them in shame.

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