Archive for the ‘Motivation’ Category

 Verse 22

The flexible are preserved unbroken.

The bent become straight.

The empty are filled.

The exhausted become renewed.

The poor are enriched.

The rich are confounded.

Therefore wise men embrace the one

And set an example to all.

Not putting on a display,

They shine forth.

Not justifying themselves,

They are distinguished.

Not boasting,

They receive recognition.

Not bragging,

They never falter.

They do not quarrel,

So no one quarrels with them.

Therefore the ancients say, “Yield and overcome.”

Is that an empty saying?

Be really whole,

And all things will come to you.

Lao-tzu

When I read this verse I think about my very good friend who is going through a rather rough patch in his life. He is suffering some great trials and tribulations and I feel how he handles it will make or break him. If he stands rigid and wallows in his misfortunes he will most likely break amidst his personal storm. If he stays flexible and goes with the storm like a palm tree he will be preserved unbroken. If he yields he will overcome. Dr. Dyer uses the example of a palm tree in a hurricane to illustrate the lessons in this verse. Even with winds of up to 200 mph the palm tree survives even though other trees are being ripped from the ground. The secret of the palm tree is its flexibility. It moves with the winds sometimes all the way to the ground. When the storm has passed the palm tree remains straight.

The first few lines of the 22nd verse of the Tao Te Ching gives me the same feeling of hope as in the book of Matthew. I know it is not an exact match but the feeling I get from this verse is the same I get from reading Jesus’ speech on top of the mountain. I feel a great sense of hope when I read these words. In embracing the one you will become flexible able to withstand anything life throws your way. When you hit a point where you are empty and life is dragging you by the heels rejoice because you will be filled. There is something comforting in these words. To me it gives me strength to weather my own personal storms. I take solace in knowing when I am completely empty I will be filled. I find peace in realizing everything I need is already given to me. I hope one day I can completely embrace the one and be a teacher to others.

I know I have said this before but the Tao Te Ching like other religious scriptures covers many of the same concepts. This verse gives us lessons to confront our greatest enemy our very own ego. If we stop trying to become noticed all the time whether it be at our jobs, with our friends, or in a relationship we will shine brighter. If we stop justifying ourselves all the time we will be heard. This is hard for me because I feel I need to justify myself all the time. I feel a compelling urge to always be right, and I will fight my point to the bitter end. I am certain if I were to shut my mouth and remain open minded to the words I am hearing the outcomes would improve ten fold. Not only would I truly hear what is being said; my points will then be better received. If we choose to listen and not argue or fight with those around us then no one will quarrel with us. If we are living a Tao centered life, then how can anyone truly be offended by your actions?

We need to plant a palm tree seed within ourselves nurtured with the greatness of the Tao. Our roots should be grounded in a Tao centered life. If we can accomplish this we can weather any storm. Like the palm trees in nature everything they need to survive is provided to them by the Tao. The reason these things are provided because the tree is receptive to the Tao’s nourishment. We need to have this same kind of faith, we need to trust that everything we need is here right now, and everything we will ever need will be provided as long as we are receptive. The Tao isn’t trying to get somewhere other than where it is. It has no goals, desires, or judgments it flows everywhere because it is the energy of creation. We are taught to be empty. I think the only way we can be filled is by becoming completely empty. We need to rid ourselves of possessions, attachments, desires, and ego. If we become empty and receptive we will be filled with the loving energy of the Tao.

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“My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging.”
Hank Aaron

Henry Louis “Hank” Aaron: (born February 5, 1934 in Mobile, Alabama) is a retired Hall of Fame baseball player whose Major League Baseball (MLB) career spanned the years 1954 through 1976. Aaron is widely considered one of the greatest baseball players of all time.

Sports figures have given us many memorable motivational quotes throughout history. These quotes not only give us motivation to keep trying on the field, but off it as well. An athlete may give us a quote that only pertains to on the field perspective, but we can always incorporate it into our personal lives. The lessons we learn about ourselves through participation in competitive sports reflects in our personal and professional lives long after we hang up the cleats.

In baseball if you are able to achieve a .350 batting average you just had an All Star season, you would be praised by the fans, as well as by your peers. If you are able to finish your career with a lifetime batting average of .350 or greater; you would have written your own ticket to the Hall of Fame. If we stop to think about this success to failure ratio, a Major League Baseball All Star only succeeds 35% of the time! I do not know many companies who would keep an employee who failed 65% of the time.

I use the batting average analogy with my children who participate in sports. They will get down if they have a bad at bat, fumble, or just an overall bad game. This success to failure ratio in sports will put a smile on their faces, knowing those they look up to also have bad games. They are motivated for their next at bat, next down, or their next game. I think this and the analogy of practice makes perfect have given my kids valuable lessons on how to succeed in sports and in life.

Sometimes failures can become our greatest lessons. In life we will make many mistakes. We should look at mistakes as learning opportunities. These lessons shape us into who we are through trial and error; success and failures. We learn what works and what doesn’t, and hopefully refrain from what doesn’t; sometimes that can be a mistake all on its own. The mistakes we make today will become tomorrow’s good choices. Imagine a world where everyone was perfect 100% of the time. In my vision this world seems dull, and not very much fun. The reason we cherish and remember successes so much is because of the lessons and stories behind them. Trying to accomplish a task or fulfilling a dream will result in many failures before you are successful. This builds character and teaches us about perseverance. Actress Julie Andrews (The Sound of Music) said it best.

“Perseverance is failing 19 times and succeeding the 20th

The nice thing about living creatures is we are resilient. If a lioness gave up every time she failed to make a kill; her pride would starve. If we were to give up every time we experienced failure in our personal and professional life we would cease to advance and grow. We are similar to our idols in professional sports; we will be judged on our successes and failures. In order for us to reach the Hall of Fame in life we need to keep swinging.

Far too often we run into issues where people attempt to change us, or we seek desperately to change ourselves. These attempts bleed negatively into our lives. The more you try to forcefully change things the more complicated things become. We are not flowing with the Tao we are resisting it. This is not to say change is not possible, I know this because I am not the man I was ten years ago. I have grown and changed my inner self. These changes were made not because of force; they just were. This is healthy change because it is natural. It is change when change was meant to be.

The more you focus on the negative parts of someone the positives tend to get lost. For better or worse I am who I am, I need to be proud of my positives and be aware of my negatives. I have gone through my entire life hearing about my negatives. I have lost my self-worth. It is so easy to put someone down for there faults. The more you do this to someone the harder it becomes for the person to see their positives.  

I can no longer allow this type of cycle in my life. I need to surround myself with people, who love and appreciate my strengths, while loving me and holding me up from my weaknesses. The Rambling Taoist told me one time he is aware of his strengths, while also being aware of his limitations. I need to accept my own personal limitations, and be at ease with them. We cannot always be the person people want us to be, but we can be content with who we are without succumbing to others negativity.

Favor and disgrace seem alarming.

High status greatly afflicts your person.

Why are favor and disgrace alarming?

Seeking favor is degrading:

alarming when it is gotten,

alarming when it is lost.

Why does high status greatly afflict your person?

The reason we have a lot of trouble

is that we have selves.

If we had no selves,

what trouble would we have?

Man’s true self is eternal,

yet he thinks, I am this body and will soon die.

If we have no body, what calamities can we have?

One sees himself as everything

is fit to be guarding of the world.

One who loves himself as everyone

is fit to be teacher of the world

Lao-tzu

The thirteen verse of the Tao Te Ching is encouraging us to live with an independent mind. We need to be free from the positive and negative opinions of others, and allow yourself to be guided by your internal nature. In order for us to flow with the Tao and live within the natural order of the universe we need to nourish our individuality. If we make the assessments of others more important than our own we will afflicted.

Seeking others acceptance, praise, and a desire for higher status goes against the natural order of things. The Bible says we are given free will. The Tao teaches us a similar lesson in that the Tao does not interfere or force itself upon us. The Tao lets us work in our own way to produce results naturally. Whatever approval is due to us will come to us, any wealth or status will be in perfect alignment as long as we are flowing with the Tao. This is also true for any disapproval; it will come in perfect alignment with the universe. The more we try to go against the grain of the Tao; the greater chance of a splinter.

The Tao tells us that living for ourselves is not the way to go. In earlier verses we learned feeding into our ego and its desire for possessions and self-importance is destructive to living our lives with the Tao. If we are able to live without ego, and without selves or concern for status and praise than we should have no problem following and listening to our true selves, free from outside influences.

I have problems following this verse; due to my low self-esteem I rely on what others think of me to fuel my life. I need this praise to continue following and listening to my internal self. If I receive no praise I tend to let go of my true self and conform to a certain way of life to feel I am important. I am a slave to outside messages of praise, I allow others opinion of me or my writing to direct my life. If someone gives me disfavor it destroys my inner self and I work really hard to change their opinion of me. I am sometimes able to live the way of the Tao and allow my independent mind to flow freely. When I am able to achieve this I am filled with a greater sense of happiness.

I need to spend more time meditating and listening to what my inner self is passionate about and what my inner self feels about who I am, follow it. This will put me in harmony with the Tao and the universe. I want to become a teacher of this world.

The supreme good is like water,

which nourishes all things without trying to.

It flows to low places loathed by all men.

Therefore, it is like the Tao.

Live in accordance with the nature of things.

In dwelling, be close to the land.

In meditation, go deep in the heart.

In dealing with others, be gentle and kind.

In speech, be true.

In ruling be just.

In action, watch the timing

No fight: No blame

One who lives in accordance with nature

does not go against the way of things.

He moves in harmony with the present moment,

always knowing the truth of just what to do.

Lao-tzu

The 8th verse is one of my many favorites of the Tao Te Ching. In meditation, with the goal of becoming centered I focus on the main theme of this verse; “living in the Tao is to flow as water flows.” Throughout my day, I find myself trying to control situations, or forcing situations. When I stew in this mind frame I fall in the trap of ego, and go away from the Tao. When I am un-centered in such a way, my life goes astray.

If you try to forcefully grab water; it will elude you. If you cup your hand you will be able to hold it. If you hold on to long it will lose its essence. These lessons about water hold true to our personal lives, and our ability to live with the Tao.

If we try to forcefully grab the people around us, they will be gone. If we try to hold on to tight, and deny our partners of their natural order; they grow complacent. If we allow those around us to flow free, they will meet our needs without being asked. If we think about water; it does without doing. When it rains, water does not intend to water the crops and provide plants with sustenance. Water does not try to quench our thirst, it just does. Water is the key ingredient to life, yet it does not try to be. Water is the purest form of doing without doing.

Water has no goal in mind of changing the many things it encounters, or the obstacles in its path, because of this water can literally move mountains. Water will flow, and within time it will erode the very mountains and valleys which contain it. Water flowing down the river, will not allow a rock or many rocks to stop it on its path. It goes around, over, or under. It still maintains its essence and strength, despite the obstacles it faces. When water flows past its obstacles it does not hold on to the experience it lets it go. These are valuable life lessons.

The lesson of water flowing downward, instead of upward is another valuable lesson. Water will flow down, even if it means it ends up in our sewers. Without the water in our sewers our waste would flood the streets. Water endures this place loathed by men, not because it has no choice; it just does. It does not attempt to take the highroad in order to evade this fate. We to can learn to not flow upward. We can live this in our personal and professional lives, as well as a lesson on how to treat your fellow-man.

In “The Hidden Messages in Water,” by Masaru Emoto, he explored the way this compound reacts. He discovered by respecting and loving it, we can change its crystallization process. He kept water in two separate containers with different words on each one. He discovered the containers that contained words such as “love,” “thank you,” or “your beautiful” the water became beautiful radiant crystals. The containers with words such as “you fool,” “Satan,” or “I will kill you” the crystals broke apart, were distorted, and seemed confused. This is yet another example of the significance of water. If we are made up of primarley water, and we are out of balance, or unloved the result is distortion and confusion.

Water shows us the cycle of the Tao, it comes from the Tao in the form of rain. In its existence on earth it lives the Tao lessons, by action with no action and giving without being asked. Finally it evaporates into the Tao only to fall again.

“Water of life am I, poured forth for thirsty men.”

Isaiah 44:3

 

Two days ago I posted a blog entry on this site  from my website  www.thephilosophyofme.com. The entry was a philosophical entry inspired from one of my many favorite quotes from Edward Abbey.

“A patriot must always be ready to defend his country against his government.”

I wrote about how important it was for Americans to open their eyes and see how our government continually lets us down. Our Constitution opens up with “WE the People.” This country has completely lost this meaning. WE continue to elect officials who are “in it for themselves,” because of this we get what we vote for. I know there are honest politicians who generally want to move this country forward. These honest officials are over matched by their peers, and their opportunity to make real progress is lost in the Capital Hill status quo.

In my post the other day I received some comments from my favorite and most active reader; The Rambling Taoist (he can be read at ramblingtaoist.blogspot.com I highly recommend his blog.) He informed me, that with all the bullshit in politics it is a futile dream to expect real change. He spent 15 years of his life, trying to make such change and came up empty.

My response was quoting him the famous Taoist saying “A thousand mile journey begins with a single step.” He gave me such advice on a different issue a few weeks back. I feel the American people have been so indoctrinated into being consumer slaves, they become complacent with life and the status quo. If WE were able to form as a people; over time WE would take our country back.

I would give up my longshot dream of becoming a full-time writer to know one day this dream would become a reality. I would love to be alive to see this day, but if it took 75 years I would be at peace with the outcome. To know I was a part of making OUR country great again would be the greatest honor.

I know there are people in this country who feel the same way, but they suffer from the concept of “what can I as an individual do?” I am confident if enough people would listen and see the truth they would stand up and demand they be served by their elected officials.

If WE look through history all great empires crumble. If WE truly see where are country has gone, WE can see… history will repeat itself. Our country began deteriorating from within long ago, and because of lack of knowledge the people of this country have allowed it to happen. It is because of greed and the pursuit of the all mighty dollar; our country has fallen apart while other countries have grown and prospered. WE are hated around the globe, and WE have no one to blame but ourselves.

The Peoples Republic should be self funded by the people. We should have no need to accept money from those who are determined to destroy this once great nation. WE need to start at the state level and begin electing those who are for the people. WE need to work ourselves up from the lowest positions until we have moved and taken over the highest positions. This can be accomplished if we band together and form as one. I can guarantee once the two evils see real change is coming they will have no choice but to straighten their crooked paths less they be forced out of power.

WE can no longer elect charlatans who run their campaigns on lies and empty promises. How much longer can WE as a nation continue down this same old path? How many times are we going to fall for these hollow words. The majority of America (the dying middle class) have given up on the prospect of change; so much so they have refused to even vote. The right of voting is crucial to our government, yet the ones who vote are the corrupted church, the wealthy, and the uneducated who continue to believe lies.

It is coming together,  standing in unity, and striving for change. Our forefathers had the strength to stand up to their oppressors, and built our country around ensuring this type of oppression never happens again. If it does they gave us the right to stand against it. We can no longer stand by and let our given freedoms be taken from us. Unity and courage will result in rebuilding this once great country. Whether it takes 5 or 75 years, we have the power to make a change, if we only have the courage to change it.

Shakopee author recounts his life struggle in poetry

By Kristin Holtz

Shakopee Valley News

Staff Writer

Tim Lundmark was living his darkest days.

Unhappy with his life accomplishments, he was frustrated he wasn’t achieving his dreams. Struggling with mental illness, he chose a date – Feb. 8, 2010 – to end it all.

But what started as his goodbye to his family became the net he needed to pull him out of his depression.

Lundmark, 30, of Shakopee recently published his first book of poetry, “My Descent Into Madness,” a dark, emotional look into his inner struggle to live.

“It’s very personal. It’s very emotional,” he said. “Not only was it tough to write but sometimes going back to read it, it’s hard to even remember writing it.”

Lundmark, who grew up in Eden Prairie and moved to Shakopee five years ago, has lived with mental illness for more than a decade. Last August, he hit a deep low.

Married with three children, Lundmark began writing poetry as a suicide note to explain the pain and hopelessness he was experiencing. He thought death was the only way out, and even though he knew it would cause his family pain, he truly thought they would be better off without him.

“My Descent Into Madness” chronicles the raw emotions Lundmark felt as he contemplated suicide. The poem, “Lie,” sums up much of its author’s struggle:

Fall Begins and everything dies/No more time to live a lie/If you think you can save me/With one last note or plea/You’d be wrong/I lack the will to be strong

Lundmark’s final poem, “To My Children,” has an especially powerful impact; it was to be his final entry, dated Feb. 8, not only saying goodbye but asking for forgiveness, too.

Lundmark said his wife, Nicole, knew he was journaling but had no idea of the struggles going on inside his head. It was her encouragement, however, which helped him emerge from the darkness. She suggested he publish his poetry.

“My wife pulled me out of the darkness by turning that writing into something I would attempt to get published. That realization I would live out a dream I had since fifth grade to be a published author snapped me out of the low I was in,” Lundmark said.

“Lundmark’s book reads as an ode to the American Dream gone wrong. Most of his poems are dark reflections on mental illness and a man struggling to cope with the society in which he lives,” wrote author Karen Mason in an Internet review on “My Descent.” “The poems are harrowing and stark in places.”

Lundmark said he was slightly scared about putting his personal struggles into such a public arena. He hopes the book generates empathy – and comfort – for those living with mental illness.

“I hope that reading my pain and my suffering and reading these things that it’s moving to people,” he said. “At the same time I hope that people going through the same thing might be able to identity with the things that I’m going through.”

Lundmark intends to use proceeds from the book toward creating the Bucket List Foundation to improve the lives of people living in nursing homes. The foundation would unite volunteers and elderly, possibly helping them to finish off their “bucket lists.”

“I’d like to do something to help those people out and make their last days happy days,” said Lundmark, who works as a staffing coordinator at Mission Nursing Home in Plymouth.

Lundmark’s days are better today, too, with a renewed purpose as a published author. He said while that dream gave him hope when he needed it, it was his wife and children which pulled him from the darkest depths of despair.

“If it wasn’t for [Nicole] and her caring, who knows where I would [have been] Feb. 8,” he said.

Kristin Holtz can be reached at (952) 345-6678 or kholtz@swpub.com.

 “My Descent Into Madness”

By Tim Lundmark

Available: E-mail Lundmark at thephilosophyofme@yahoo.com

Learn more about the book at Lundmark’s blog http://www.mydescentintomadness.wordpress.com

 

The events over the last 6 months has opened up many doors for me. I was able to realize my life long dream of becoming a published author. This accomplishment gave me the courage and confidence to attempt some other personal dreams. I was able to create a website, albeit a pretty lame one but a website I can call my own. I started a daily blog, and I founded The Bucket List Foundation. Since all these things have happened the creative flood gates have been opened which has given me the motivation to start other book projects. The following are the current projects I am working on. Due to my ADD I need to work on multiple projects, because I grow board with working on just one at a time.

Dylan Thomas: This is a children’s book series written in poetry form. The goal is to create stories which appeal to ages 2-10. I want the rhyming and lush drawings to not only draw the kids in, but also make the stories enjoyable for the parents as well. I have completed the first story, but I have run into a wall with an illustrator.

The Definitive Theology Timeline: This is a working title. My goal is to track religion from its conception and its evolution into what we know today. I intend to include every possible religion I can. I am not going to go into great depth on each one, just some basics like creation stories, Gods, messiah, end-times and the basic belief system. I am guessing each chapter will be about fifteen to twenty pages. I am around 200 pages deep into this with a long way to go.

Deceived: (working title) This book examines how the Christian religion has allowed itself to be destroyed by the word of man. You would be amazed how much the bible has been changed to not only create copyrights, but to change the originally meaning of the “Word of God” to fit mans needs.

The Mind of a Madman: (working title) This is a novel written in poetry form describing the inner workings of a psychopath, starting from the time of conception up until… the rest will be a surprise.

The Philosophy of Me: The life and mind of no one special: This will be a book based of 365 days of my blogging experience. I am unsure if a blogger has created a book based off a year of their posts, but I thought I would give it a try. If nothing else perhaps I will create more exposure to my cause.

Finally I am working on two other poetry chapbooks, which at this moment in time have no names. The goal is to self publish then shop the manuscripts to publishers and literary agents.

I have become frustrated with where I am at with the seven-year plan. My website www.thephilosophyofme.com was a complete waste of money. I am being screwed by my publisher PublishAmerica, and I feel my blog and website lack an identity. I am flustered and I have hit a wall, which I am finding is hard to climb.

I am working on a children’s book, when I submitted my first draft, it completely sucked and needs to be completely revamped. I have a vision in my mind as far as how I want it to look. I think this version will be far better than the first. The problem is when it is complete I have to rely on my illustrator to finish the pictures. He is a busy man, so not sure how long the illustrations will take.

I have a concept for a book called Conversations on Life. The book will be co-written by my best friend Dan. I know with our unique view on life, philosophy, theology, and everything in-between. I have faith this will be good, it is hard to get it going due to conflicts in schedules. I have two other concepts one is a book called Deceived, this is about the history and manipulation of Christianity. This requires hours of research which I do not have. The final concept is a theology book about every religion throughout time. This will include; creation stories, origins, believe system, destruction of, morals, apocalyptic stories, and many more. I have a few others, but they are not as defined as the other ones.

I want these to become realities, but the reality is there is no time to work on them. I am frustrated about this, because I know it hinders my advancement of my seven-year plan.

My publisher PublishAmerica is screwing me, and without the decency of a reach around. My book “My Descent into Madness” was released on my publisher’s website the end of December. I advertised it on my Facebook account, my blog, and created a website to promote it. I put so much emotion into this book, and the contents can never be reproduced. I submitted my manuscript to numerous publishers, I also self published it. I was excited when I received the e-mail from PublishAmerica. My dream had come true, little did I know this dream would turn into a nightmare.

PublishAmerica sends out royalty checks and statements the end of February and the end of August. I recieved an e-mail statement telling me I had sold zero books. I knew for a fact I had sold some, because I recieved confirmation from friends and family on Facebook that they purchased this book. I responded to the e-mail and stated to them they had their figures wrong. I told them family and friends had purchased the book, so I knew they were wrong. I filed a BBB complaint I said they were committing fraud, and were in breach of the contract. I asked to be released from the contract.

I received an e-mail from the crooks at PublishAmerica. The representative said I needed to provide proof of the sales. They needed confirmation numbers among other things. She stated if I provided this then she would look into it. She also stated they were in a court battle with their printing company and that is the cause for why I had not recieved proper credit.

I responded to the e-mail, and told them their rhetoric was insulting to me. I explained to them, I had received a bank statement from a co-worker, and it states they were charged by PublishAmerica. I asked them what that had to do with their printing company. If my co-worker was charged by PublishAmerica and not their printing company what the fuck does that have to do with their law suit. I also said how in 2010 with a website, how they do not know where sales were going on their own website. I explained to them, I don’t care about the royalty mony, but I do care about knowing how my book is selling. I have yet to receive a response. I can produce proof of some of the sales, but how am I to produce proof of sales for people I do not know. I am advertising this book in two places, I have done two interviews, so how the fuck am I supposed to prove sales? This means I will never see a dime from these fuckers, and I will never know how succesful or unsuccessful my book was.

That book meant so much to me, I poured my heart and soul into it. I am now finding out I am just getting pimped. I have no recourse to fix this, I will be getting screwed for the next seven years. My publisher sends me e-mails all the time offering me discounts to purchase my book. I should set it up somehow to have people buy directly from me. I would sell the book for what I paid for it. I do not care about the money.

I do not have an identity, I mean how would you categorize my blog? It is all over the place. I talk about something one day, then something completely different the next. I look at blogs which receives tons of traffic, and they focus on one subject. I need to know what my identity is, if I can’t then I am wasting my time blogging.

I do not have an identity on my website, right now the site blows nuts. I am unsure how to fix it. I need to advertise it, but google and yahoo is not cheap. The site promotes my book which I will never receive credit for. It has a forum, which I thought could be a support group for people suffering from mental illness and those who care for them. I thought it would be a place where people could share how they cope, and advice on caring for your loved ones. I have been the only one who has posted something on it. How do you even promote something like that?

My site receives a decent amount of traffic considering you can’t find it anywhere on the internet except for some free banner ads, and via my blog. There is no reason for people to come back, because it lacks anything of value. I wasted my money on the website, I am wasting time blogging, and I am getting pimped out like a cheap whore by my publisher.

In five days from now the four founding members of “The Bucket List Foundation” will be holding our inaugural meeting. I am very excited about this for many reasons, but today I would like to focus on one aspect of my excitement. Those of you who either know me personally, or have become regular readers, are aware what my poetry book is all about, and how I suffer from a mental illness. I am battling this illness with the healing power of doing for others. I have found when I am able to live by the motto “how may I serve” I feel much better inside. This is not an easy motto to follow especially considering the “me first” society we have been raised in. The days I can follow this are the days where I have the least amount of stress; which in turn keeps my MI in check. 

I am basking in the idea of getting this thing going, and just thinking about how many lives will be improved if we were able to get this foundation off the ground. The thought of doing for others, assists in elevating my moods. I would imagine if the concept of doing the idea is uplifting; logic would conclude if it came to fruition then my moods should consistently level out.

I look at this foundation, as not only the ability to enrich people’s lives, but also to put past demons to rest. I have made more mistakes in my life than I care to count, perhaps dedicating my life to serving others I can begin to forgive myself. The major fuel for my depression is self loathing; perhaps this can mend the emptiness inside of me. I am naturally a selfish person. It is difficult to concisely put others first. Like I stated above I think I am a product of the “me first” society. I have such entitlement issues it is simply unbelievable.

The Tao teaches us first you need to learn it, then you need to think it, then you will live it. I hope this concept is true in my case. I have learned it, I have thought about it, yet I am unable to live it 100% of the time. I have more difficulty thinking of others when I am depressed because all I want to do is seclude myself and sleep.   

I am fully aware the odds are stacked against us. There may be a real possibility that time and effort is put into this project only to result in failure. Where will my mind wonder if this happens? I have the utmost faith in our cause. I have confidence in the people around me. In my mind failure is not an option; a possibility maybe, but not an option. Only time will tell if this dream will become a reality, until then I am going to trust the Tao that everything will fall in its divine order. Today I choose to embrace healing by helping.